It finally happened: I bought a PlayStation 4.
This is momentous news! Mainly, because I haven’t actually played video games in years and I don’t care about gamers much (except for my old housemate, Rob, who was cool) and the whole #GamerGate thing was really off-putting (my stance: if you threaten someone online to hurt or rape them, you’re automatically wrong). Sure, I’ve tried to get into them again a few times, but never with any success. As video games have become prettier and more “social” I’ve become less interested, because I am a grump. At heart, I’m a sucker for those games with shitty graphics that you have to get to know intimately, trying to master the mechanics like a dweeb but never being able to go very far — which is why roguelikes are so great for me. I never give a shit about games like Assassin’s Creed or Call of Duty or even World of Warcraft, which once upon a time I would’ve assumed might be up my street.
But, even though it was 2014 that was the year of fun, it’s not like I’m not trying to have fun anymore. And it’s hard to have fun if you can’t shut down your brain. Nothing says “mindless, pointless activity” like playing video games.
But this has been a surprisingly emotional decision. The first time I tried to buy the PS4, I actually walked for about 45 minutes to get to a place where I assumed they would sell PlayStation 4s (they did!), waited in line, and decided at the very last minute not to go ahead with my terrifying purchase. Then, the next day, I went back and bought it. No idea what that wavering was all about. In fact, over the last few months I’ve wondered repeatedly whether to buy a games console again, then told myself I would, but never did.
This time, I even bought a copy of the new Assassin’s Creed! Which I am fairly sure I will not play for more than a few hours at most.
I spent like 15 minutes trying to figure out how to insert a game disc into the PlayStation 4. I had to Google it, and then I realized that the disc tray doesn’t come out like on an old-school computer. You can just stick the disc into the slot directly. This is how out of touch I’ve become.
But I’ve done it. I bought myself a video game console. Take that, strange ideal of remaining a Luddite forever!